Saturday in Iowa City is about to feel like a chili cook-off that accidentally turned into a demolition derby. Iowa football is basically a medieval catapult—slow to reload, but when it hits, it leaves craters and sadness everywhere. The Hawkeyes’ defense is a buzzsaw with corn-fed horsepower, and they’d happily win a game 9–6 just to prove a point about toughness. Indiana, meanwhile, is that scrappy friend who keeps getting thrown out of the bar but somehow sneaks back in through the side door ready to cause more chaos.

This matchup screams old-school Big Ten energy with a side of caffeine and regret. Iowa will try to drag Indiana into the mud, chew clock, and punt like it’s an art form, while the Hoosiers will chuck haymakers and hope one lands big enough to flip the script. By the fourth quarter, fans will either be in love with the defensive slugfest or begging someone to install a second scoreboard just for punts. The winner walks out with bragging rights and a shot at Big Ten relevance, the loser walks home wondering why they signed up for four hours of pure cornfield chaos.